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would you be a good race announcer?
Fri, 04/02/2010 - 12:58pm
At the 1st Annual PG&E Criterium, we are going to try something different...
Guest announcers!
So, do you think you could hang with Phil and Paul? Do you scoff at Dave Towle and yearn for a shot at calling a live race?!?! Or maybe you've wondered, hmmm, if Dave Silva and Al Trautwig, got paid for THAT, where do I sign up?
Answer: Right here! We at Tri Valley Velo are willing to give TWO or THREE of you a chance to co-announce* your choice of fields on May 8th. All you need to do is pick a field (or two) below, and explain WHY we should give you a chance. Nice voice, broadcast experience, cool European accent, inside knowledge of the top and/or typical racers and teams, a suitcase full of interesting verbal analogies, whatever.
Winners will be selected by an informal and subjective process based on the strength of your message. We are also willing to entertain that you nominate someone - who would you LIKE to hear announce, and why? Of course, they have to be willing to do it...
Oh, and the winners will get ONE FREE RACE REGISTRATION (may be transferred to a different rider) and LUNCH.
So, have at it!
Race Day Fields for PG&E Criterium:
8:00 cat 5
8:40 35+ cat 5
9:30 women cat 4
10:20 cat 4
noon kids
12:40 45+/55+ 1/2/3
1:30 35+ 1/2/3
2:40 cat 3
3:50 pro/1/2
Race on, Xeno
*Regular announcer will be our own Jim Volsansky, if you get stage fright or use questionable language, we reserve the right to give you the hook. We are willing to consider a two-person team, but you better have some good logic!
velogirl wrote:what's the date?
Yeah, May8th
Lorri - you'd be awesome for the W4 race - or any field you choose - you'd know so many racers!
Anyone? Won't get this chance very often!
Now that was funny!
I will tell you the winner now. It will be me. First place numero uno, grande machismo muy grande. Because I am much, much faster than you. Like a motorcycle on crack, except without the motorcycle or the crack. And much prettier. Like a lion except not so hairy. And I will win with style and class and flair while you are choking in my rocket powered speedy dust. You will barely be able to stay on your girly sloping top tubed bike as my sonic-boom shock wave stuns you when I pass you like you're standing still. And maybe, because you worked so hard in the pack during the race on your silly little bike with the handle bar streamers and fenders, I will give you the extra small gloves I've won for first place, or share the t-shirt and mountain bike tubes and 10 dollar gift certificate I have won during many a prime. After the podium pictures, you can tell me how great and amazing and handsome I was in the race, and I will pretend like I am interested in hearing what you have to say while I stoicly look into the distance. And at the next race, you will wave "hi" and I will wave back, not remembering who you are but acting like I do to be polite. But I will vaguely remember that faded green jersey and the old nut-case wearing it, and will think fondly back on the times when he was youthful and strong, not old and tired and angry and cynical with the world. And I will wonder, did he lose his sanity from the glee he felt when he disclosed my name and shamed me amongst my fellow racers on the forum, or one too many complicated witty exchanges on said forum, or was it from too many criterium concussions or after race beers? Then I will think, "oooo, look at the flowers" or something like that, and remember not to measure my self worth by how well I'm liked on an internet forum.
The Truth wrote:I appreciate the offer, and I will take you up on it if I don't end up racing the 45+ category. I can promise you if I do announce for you I will probably be able to tell you who will win the race, and possibly give you some very interesting facts about my felllow racers having raced with most of them on and off since the 80's or so. I may even let you know my real name. It's not such a big deal.
Bernie,
Yeah, no one cares. And no, you won't pick the winner.
I appreciate the offer, and I will take you up on it if I don't end up racing the 45+ category. I can promise you if I do announce for you I will probably be able to tell you who will win the race, and possibly give you some very interesting facts about my felllow racers having raced with most of them on and off since the 80's or so. I may even let you know my real name. It's not such a big deal.
Sorry if I wasn't clear, I thought candidates could post their message right here. Or you can PM me - but if you think you are up for announcing, go public now! Seems we could use a new good forum topic these days.
Ok, okay... if you want to make your case directly to me... and keep your identity here anonymous (right Truth?), go ahead and hit me by e-mail:
xeno.rasmusson
at
csueastbay.edu
RacerX wrote:
Guest announcers!
So, do you think you could hang with Phil and Paul?
Winners will be selected by an informal and subjective process based on the strength of your message.
And where do we send our message?? And to whom?
May 8th
Tim
A day that I'm on the bike is a good day.
what's the date?
Lorri Lee Lown
http://www.velogirls.com